please read

Check out my short story. I wrote this few years ago. I'm posting it again to receive comments. I revised it recently. Next time I'll be posting the short story written in Filipino which I wrote a year ago for our Rhetoric class. The setting of the story is my hometown- San Agustin, Romblon. But The Yellow Jacket was purely from a place in my mind. Its original title was The Yelow Jacket of Ardor.

The Yellow Jacket
By Marianne Lim

“I don’t know… Maybe this is one of those things, one should never ask. Maybe it’s one of those things with no beginning and no end… Maybe it’s like God, the Alpha and the Omega… … don’t know… don ‘t know why it’s like that… All I know is that they say it’s all in the heart…”Chapter III Book of Yellow Jacket of Ardor

If you happen to see a petite and quiet lady across the street then that is Chalance. This is Chalance Intrepid, not the most unusual female on earth but one with the most unusual name. She usually sits on a corner of her bed with a notebook and a pencil. She writes…well, vigorously. Her bedroom is on the attic of their old house. She writes because of events. She writes when something happens to her. She writes when something happens to the country. She writes when something happens to the world. She writes when something happens to other people. Right now, she writes because something happened to her.

Chalance Intrepid met a person. Maybe it’s a person who would, maybe forever, change her life. Chalance Intrepid always wishes for something to happen to her. She wants to get out of her insanely monotonous life. She wakes up at exactly 5:15 in the morning, brushes her teeth, cooks breakfast for the family, eats, takes a bath, puts on her blue uniform, and at exactly 7:25 leaves for work in her old, brown VW. She arrives at the office with two stacks of paper to finish. She finishes at 4 in the afternoon, goes to a nearby grocery store, buys what’s missing in the house and at 4:45 goes home. She arrives with an over cheerful smile on her face, kisses the two old people on their porch, unpacks, changes clothes, cleans house, washes clothes, cooks dinner, watches television, eat, read a few, writes anything, and sleeps at exactly 10:15 in the evening. Everyday it’s like this. Everyday of her life it is like this. Except on Sundays, where she doesn’t have to go to work. On Sundays, Chalance cleans and trims the garden and takes her old bicycle to a park nearby and drives all by herself.

“What if it will never come… I thought they said ‘There’s always that ONE who will certainly arrive’… What if it wouldn’t come for me?…what if it already did?”Chapter V Book of Yellow Jacket of Ardor

One Sunday, Chalance Intrepid went to the park. She sat on one abandoned tree to refresh herself. As usual, Chalance stares blankly at the park when she noticed a man about her age (she’s 28) jogging with a black Labrador. Chalance seldom notices anything. There must be something special about this to her. Suddenly, the man disappeared and Chalance shrugged her shoulders and continued staring at the trees. She felt a strong tug at her big shirt. She never shrieks so she just gave a soft, surprise gasp at the dog tugging her shirt. Then the jogging man appeared and sharply said “Hale, stop it!” The dog immediately let go of her shirt and went to his master. The jogging man bowed slightly and spoke. “My apologies Miss, my dog’s a little overwhelmed to know you.” Chalance just said, “It’s ok.” The jogging man extended his hand and said, “I’m Mark James.” She took it and said, “Hi.” The man said, “Mind if I sit here for a while? What about you? What’s your name?” She consciously said, “Um no, it’s alright. I’m Chalance Intrepid.” Mark looked at her curiously and said, “I didn’t get that.” She spelled it for him and said, “I like your dog’s name.” Mark patted the Labrador and said, “Hale. It means strong. Just like my boy.” The dog wagged its tail. “Just like my name”, Chalance blurted out. Mark said, “What?” “I said just like my name. It’s from a word. It’s supposed to be nonchalance…casual. But I am not so they made it Chalance. And my surname Intrepid, it means fearless.” Mark just smiled and said, “Interesting.” Then something sounded like a small buzz. It turned out to be Mark’s phone. He took it from the pocket of his jogging pants, stood up and said, “Well, I go to go… Will I see you here next Sunday?” She shyly said, “Maybe.” Mark said, “Good.” Then he reached into his pocket and amazingly took out a pen, took her left hand and wrote 62599387. He smiled and said, “If I’m not here on Sunday, call me, please.” Then he left.

“There are different shades of cowardice…sometimes they’re inescapable…you want to get out…you always know there is a way……But you just can’t…”Chapter VIIBook of Yellow Jacket of Ardor

Next Sunday, Chalance made it to the park but after two hours of pretending to stare at the trees, Mark didn’t make it. Although hope wasn’t lost, Chalance was extremely upset and disappointed. She went home and did her usual chores. At 9:30 in the evening, up in her room, Chalance stared longingly at the phone in the corner of her bed. She repeatedly said, “62599387”. She had memorized Mark’s phone. It was almost 10:15 but Chalance never made the call. Every night it would always happen but Chalance never made an attempt. One Saturday evening, Chalance said to herself, “What’s an Intrepid for?” Then she lifted the phone, dialed 62599387 and let it rung three times. Something clicked and a voice said, “Hello?” It was Mark. But Chalance never said a word, she just opened and closed her mouth and suddenly she put down the phone. It was almost 10 o’clock. She took her notebook and pencil and started her book, “Book of Yellow Jacket of Ardor”. She started her first lines “Yellow Jacket, there are several varieties of bright yellow of social wasps. Yellow is my cowardice. Yellow defies the fearlessness of my soul.”And Chalance Intrepid’s life was always, as always, and will ever be the same.

Original form:
08/30/05 03:45 pm
Date revised: 15/ 03/09

WHY JIM???

NO!!! Jim just died! We we're watching last Friday's episode of Ghost Whisperer and Jim, my favorite guy passed away. This is so unfair! Mr. Clancy is the most sane, level- headed and responsible character in the story. What will happen to Melinda Gordon? The only person who fully embraces her gift is Jim. Why Jim? Why? Will he ever cross over to the light? I sense reincarnation in the episodes to come. But it's still so sad...

Where???

Where is the conjunction in this sentence?

Saint Paul wrote fourteen epistles.

100 and below

Here are my ukay2 finds. All of these pieces cost 100 pesos and below. CHeck out my superb ability in snagging killer ensembles and patience in digging from hundreds of piles.

A PAINTED FACE

If my old self would see me today, I might be a little bit disgusted and a little bit fascinated. I used to look really losyang, then I became fascinated with make up. I'm not really fond of branded make up and I can definitely live without make up. But they are here and I make the most of using make up. There's nothing really wrong with it. Painting my face doesn't make me look like a whore or somebody who's just too much with everything. I'm a girl and make up is definitely my friend.

I love my lip gloss. I used SimplyPretty lip gloss tube in Raspberry. I love the moisture feeling that it leaves after applying it. Not too sticky and just enough moist. If I'm feeling really unhappy, I apply first my Rosy Pink lipstick just to feel pretty. Oh Lord, I'm so girl.

This is how exactly my blush on looks like. I love the pinkish glow it gives after applying. This is definitely one of my favorite make up product because I'm so pale. I look so pale when Im not wearing make up. I can even wear it alone, even without gloss or lipstick. I feel like a fashion/make up guru.

A blush on is never alone, it needs my super brush. I love my big blush because it applies make up evenly on both cheeks without making it look like a clown's blush.

Another favorite of mine is my silver eyeshadow. I first saw this kit on a Cinderella store a year ago. I tried it and I loved it. I usually don't experiment on eyeshadows because I'm not an expert on applying it. The other side may not match the other. I usually use blue, gold or pink eyeshadow. I thought grey or silver would look wrong on me but when I tried, it was divine. I feel like a goddess.

IF ONLY

"They say people come and go. But the truth us no one really disappears from your life. People never really leave. Their roles just change."

I'm not the type of girl who reacts delightfully at movies or romantic scenes. I'm neither the type who cries at the movies when somebody dies. However, I feel sad, or may be not that sad, over some scenes which give me a pause.
Do you remember the commercial of Flanax? Two old men who are brothers gives biking another chance. They they were doing the same old things when they were still small. When this scene flashed, it gave my heart a little kick. ISn't it nice to be a child again? How I wish sometimes that we could turn back time. Not really to change things but just to again what made us really happy and simply leave in peace.
Another commercial that painted a sad smile on my face was McDo's. It's the commercial about two kids who met at McDo, became friends and eventually became best friends. The little girl became the little boy's first love. When they grew up, she married another man. HOw funny life is! Not quite tragic ending but it made me think of what ifs. WHat could have happened if it was another way around? But we really can't change things in the past. What happened there still happened.
Then I read "The Cabuliwallah" by Rabindranath Tagore. I read how the two fathers wantewd their little girls to remain as little girls. But we can't really help it, people grow and peole change. The only way to stay happy today is to accept changes.
Many moths ago, when I was still wallowing in pain and heartaches, I was struggling to find happiness in my life. I thought I was happy and I'm not. It became a juggle that I could not recognize real happiness. Then a kind soul told me, "The best feeling in this world is realizing you're perfectly happy without the things you thought you needed most." And guess what? I am perfectly happy.
We go on living and move into the future. We have a happy life and hope for a happier one. Today is today but sometimes when we see an old picture or two, don't you just wish you could turn back time?